Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am just noticing that Wednesday's blog never posted. Interesting....Mostly because I was in a sad place when I wrote it. This is one of those weeks when I feel like I am doing some serious inner work. Nothing major has happened in my life, nothing to feel sorry for myself or any anger to displace. I'm just feeling a bit stuck. The holidays is a big whirlwind for me and then bam its a new year and all the things that I said I want to be doing by the New Year get to be looked at and some are not happening yet. I have to put yet in there. I know I have to acknowledge myself for what I am doing but it sure is hard not to beat myself up for what Im not doing. Can you relate?
Also this last week I spent some time with Marianne, my old boss. That seems to stir me up a bit. Its been 16 years since I worked for her and somehow it has become a measure for what I am to become. I am so hard on myself, I know that. I have these expectations that are huge and I don't want to lower them. I say I want to write a book but I don't dedicate the time to write. I dont feel free in my head to write. I know I am rambling, sorry about that. I feel like I have to purge. It's time to take a step and I'm just not sure which one to take. In sharing I will discover it. I hope it encourages you to do the same. I am not alone. You are not alone.
Today I am grateful for my friends. I admire and respect you. I feel so fortunate to have friends that are family to me.
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