Change Your Thoughts, Change Your World

I hit a wall.

I could think of a fancy way to say that, but I won't.

The last week or so has been challenging for me. I literally started painting walls so that I could have "a beginning a middle and an end." Yeah that's my way of saying I need some grounding so I need to do something that has a clear beginning, middle and an end point.

Do you ever feel like that?

Anyway as I was painting the bedroom, I had to remove a picture that has the words
"Change Your Thoughts, Change Your World" As I read the words for the umpteenth time, they stopped me in my tracks. Is this why I was moved to paint so that I could have this moment? 

Here I was reading these words and it was like oooh right YES! right now- what are the thoughts running around your head? My thoughts suck right now. Yep I said it out loud.

Thoughts of defeat, sadness, disconnect - record scratch.

What the heck? 

Yea so clearly, CALYL is what I need for myself right now. But man am I ever hard on myself thinking that I should not fall, should not ever be down, and definitely should never ever lose my way. Ah so crazy, my thinking sometimes and then I just end feeling seperate from everything.

Clearly I do what I do because I need it. Teach what you need to learn, right?

Ok so I outed myself and my need to control even this. Just made myself laugh. 

Lucky for me I have the most amazing people in my life who are here to remind to stop and apply self care, remind me to nurture me and they listen until I listen. I am grateful for all of it even the uncomfortableness as it has brought me to this moment. And in this moment I get access to more compassion and more understanding.

Also wanted to share this awesome 7 minutes from Abraham- it always brings me to the truth of who I am and reminds me that I will never get there. It will always be a process and there is nothing to complete because it is ever expanding and when I can relax into that all is perfectly imperfect.

Going to workout out now and TODAY is going to be a fantastic day. Why? Because I am Creating A Life I love even NOW and especially now. 

Amazing how writing helps. thanks for listening. :)